What About Adoption?

Who am I?

I'm now a full time mom, ex-'Love-My-Job-Like-Hell-Never-Thought-I'd-Quit' Marketeer :)

The usual story, took too long after getting married to start a family cos (see above para) and realised that it wasn't that easy to conceive. Traditional Chinese Meds, hormone therapy, IUI, jabs, blood tests and laproscophies over 5 years was really a lot to take. (No, we didn't try IVF). Emotionally it was taxing, lots of mood swings, of course a lot of tears - monthly, when 'Aunty Jane' visits....

[If you are on a similar journey of infertility, you're not alone and don't go through it alone. Share with your husband, your mom, your girlfriends and/or be part of a support group and if you can't find one, start one. It really helps to talk about it and be privy to thought processes shared by others.]

Adoption was a remote option of mine - yeah, the usual reasons of 1) I don't know the birthparents (smokers? on drugs? crazy genes?.... the list goes on, 2) what if he/she doesn't turn out normal? 3) Plus that, I was undergoing all the treatments and investigations - if I agree to adopt, did it mean that I have given up hope? 4) and I, like most women, wanted to experience all the good and horrible effects of pregnancy.

Then what happened?

As an answer to my prayers for a child, we met someone who was journeying with us and she, a social worker who was also journeying with a birthmom, asked if we have ever thought of adoption. The moment we said yes, everything just moved really really quickly and in a flash, we were parents to a 2 day old baby girl! And you know what, the moment we held her in our arms, the pressures of trying to conceive totally disappeared and the weight of it all was just lifted off our shoulders! Everything felt really right! Finally, a baby to call our own! We were holding OUR baby! The feeling was just incredible! When I held her against my belly, it suddenly dawned on me that this is how it would have felt if she was in my belly and the desire to experience pregnancy reduced by almost the whole lot : )

My message to all of you who are trying to conceive is: don't limit yourselves to just treatments, there are other ways to start a family. Certainly, adoption is not for everyone but do consider it as an option.

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