Checking In

My 11 yo and I were watching "This Is Us", a new American TV series about a white family who adopted a coloured boy.  They were expecting triplets but one was born asleep.  By divine intervention, the coloured boy was found on the same day in front of a fire station, and the couple felt it was how their triplets should be completed.  The show switches from past to present and how each of their relationships have evolved.

As the topic of adoption was featured, I took the opportunity to ask her if she has wondered how it would have been if she wasn't adopted; that she remained with her birthmother.  Being a very happy-go-lucky, happy girl, she looked straight at me, smiled and said,"No, la!  I'm just a regular normal girl with my normal mom.  Why would I think that?"  I smiled back, said,"Just checkin'.", and we just went on talking about something else.  

I've always learnt to 'throw a pebble' and see how the water ripples and I guess, this was such as moment.  The ripple was gentle, calm and very assuring.  

Over the past 3 years, it wasn't always like this.  There were moments the ripples were more urgent. If I didn't have the answers, I'd say I didn't know.  I'd always aim to build the trust and relationship we have by addressing and answering them as best I could and knew how.  

"When mistrust comes in, loves goes out." 
~ Irish proverb

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